Unfortunately, Rick

Yet anoth­er meme that seemed inter­est­ing. Look up “Unfor­tu­nate­ly, YouFirst­Name” on Google and quote with com­ment the results. And enjoy as a few days lat­er teh results become skewed due to the now high-con­cen­tra­tion of “Unfor­tu­nate­ly, Your­First­Name” on your blog. Appar­ent­ly, though, Real Con­tent is on vaca­tion. (All last names giv­en are removed from the following:)
“Unfor­tu­nate­ly, Rick begins to notice that Cindy, the new girl, does­n’t real­ly appear to…”

Whether she’s new or not, it’s not hard to notice when peo­ple appear to use incom­plete sentences.

“Unfor­tu­nate­ly Rick decid­ed to write anoth­er end­ing to that sto­ry and it was…”

Actu­al­ly, I nev­er got past the sec­ond chap­ter of that story.

“Unfor­tu­nate­ly Rick was too much of a mam­ma’s boy to put up any fight to her demands…”

Yeah, well… Takes one to know one!

“Unfor­tu­nate­ly Rick came from a very large family.”

My birth­day is com­ing up; those cards bet­ter start pil­ing up soon!

“Unfor­tu­nate­ly, Rick is far from the exception.”

I’m the rule!

“Unfor­tu­nate­ly, Rick has been real busy with school and has not been able to record much of anything.”

Well if some­one would buy me a TiVo for my birth­day (see above), I could do both at once. Sheesh.

“Unfor­tu­nate­ly, Rick & Bon­nie have moved away from For­est Grove but we’ll always con­sid­er them a part of Mt. Olive.”

A moun­tain-sized olive is the most ter­ri­fy­ing, gag-induc­ing thing I’ve heard of in a while. And, no, Bon­nie moved away; I’m still here.

“Unfor­tu­nate­ly Rick was denied the spot and was informed by Ale­jan­dro’s road­ie, ‘the rea­son they’re turn­ing you down is because the way you look…’ ”

I’m not ugly! …

“Unfor­tu­nate­ly, Rick told BreakTheChain.org that he will not pro­vide fur­ther details because, in his words, ‘I fear retribution…’ ”

Actu­al­ly, I fear being mis­quot­ed; the ret­ri­bu­tion thing was just a cover-up…

“Unfor­tu­nate­ly, Rick drew a red light in round one and end­ed his week­end soon­er than expected.”

I typ­i­cal­ly draw only in #2 pen­cil, so that I drew a red light is pret­ty amaz­ing… But I would nev­er, NEVER end my week­end soon­er than expect­ed. And when I fig­ure out how to length­en it…

“Unfor­tu­nate­ly, Rick has lost his stick, but it’s only used for pok­ing a bat in this lev­el so no screens are lost.”

DIE, DEVIL BIRD!!! TAKE THAT YOU WINGED SPAWN OF SATAN!!! … AAHHH!! THEY’RE IN MY HAIR! THEY’RE IN MY HAIR!! If only I had that blast­ed stick…


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Rick Beckman